Mineral Makeup

I began using mineral makeup last year and was amazed at how much it helped clear up the acne rosacea I had. Unlike other makeup from the costmetic industry it does not block pores, contain talc or other horrid agents and when I wear it I feel I am putting nutrients into my skin, very light, long lasting and healing.

Many of the big makeup suppliers on the market want us to have blocked pores, to get spots and other skin problems because when we do, we need more of their makeup! So its an ongoing cycle.

Mineral makeup heals.

However, choose wisely your supplier. Some of the bigger cosmetic labels are claiming to sell mineral makeup yet still have talc in, some claim they have no talc in but have other unpleasant fillers in their products, not displayed on their labels.

Also check out what the mineral makeup supplier says, if they say 'ingredients' they should technically list them, however, be very careful if a supplier says 'contains' this can also mean a whole host of other ingredients that could affect your skin. I feel as a consumer we have a right to not be misled in this way this is why I am posting this on my blog today, because I feel I have been misled from this new mineral makeup supplier I recently purchased from .

The reason I went to another supplier was because I had ran out of my original suppliers product and could not get in touch with her to order. Now I know many people rave on about this new supplier and they have been in magazines, however within 3 weeks of using their foundation I have had the most horrid reaction. My skin blocked up, I have horrible skin eruptions and spots on my cheeks again and basically a burning sensation on my face. My skin does not feel like it is breathing with this new supplier, with my old supplier I felt so good with it on I often forgot to take it off before bed and felt no worries on the effects it had on my skin. It breathed!

So if I was to recommend a mineral makeup supplier I would recommend the following supplier. She makes her own makeup, self tanning creams and other things, because she had major skin reactions to many products and made these wonderful cosmetics because she was frustrated with her own unpleasant experiences and reactions.

Here is the link, I order from her ebay site:

My Beautiful Earth

thanks!

Riding On Uncertainty Highway Again ... Yeeehah!

Hmmm....





I havent wrote in over a month. Very unlike me. I just feel less like writing at the moment, maybe I will begin writing more as I pass through this tunnel of uncertainty. I have to chuckle to myself just before June last year I was on a uncertainty highway and here I am again riding the fun road, the road of not knowing, the road of thrills and flowing with the tides.





Okay whats happening? well, I made a big decision in January relating to something big I had thought about doing and things changed and I continued working full time at the little gift shop I work in. I have thoroughly enjoyed my role at this job, I have enjoyed learning about many different things, about myself, about my relating with others about what excites me and more. This role however is temporary. I was full time to cover maternity leave. And although I thoroughly enjoy my role there, the people I work with do not want me to leave, I may have to as my contract will revert back to 2 days a week in June (3 days in May). So in May all things change. Next week I am going to have a chat with the owner of the store and see where I stand because I will have to open myself to other opportunities.





Its rather strange for me, as in the past, all of my jobs, I left because I did not want to work there anymore, or because I did not like the work, the company or sometimes I left because I felt my freedom was restricted working for someone else (when I feared responsibility). Other times it was when I got fired. This time I love my job, love the people I work with, love the role. So isn't that interesting. In many ways I view this as an amazing achievement, I am very very grateful for the experience and happy with myself for moving through all the fears, resistance to working for someone else and also resisting to working full time hours on somebody elses time. I moved through paranoia in the workplace and created an experience where I felt completely at home and in joy of being in the setting of the store. So this is a huge gigantic leap for me, to probably have to let it go when everything is feeling so darn great.





WOW now isn't that interesting!





Hugs to all x

Changes

So many changes have occurred inside me since we came into 2008, feelings and beliefs and thoughts I have had for 31 years have shifted. I am finding I am enjoying working where I am working right now finding real value in being there, even though I kicked up a fuss, stamped my feet several months ago about working for someone else. I see it as an experience to help me change myself, retrain my thinking and to uplift and inspire myself and others. I am enjoying running the toy and childrens floor adding my own bits of creativity along the way. The shop owner has let me have a hand in changing the shop and remerchandising and bringing in new energy. It feels very rewarding.





I am also finding my ability to change my day, my thoughts and my reality is becoming easier and I am able to flip into a better feeling thought than in the past. Also using Ho-oponopono is a real medicine for me in loving what I am feeling and the experiences I am having.





The book notes from the universe is vibrationally changing my inner world.





Other changes have happened too but they feel very private changes I need to hold close to my heart for now.





With love and thanks for still reading.

Body Speaks

Tonight I did some yoga and also did some Qi Gong after it and during Qi Gong realised my body, well a part of memory stored in my body is frightened to get my heart racing in exercises that I need to get fit. I get my heart racing in five rhythms, and as much as I do not feel fit and my stamina (at moment) does not feel as healthy as many there dancing does not feel like exercise to me.

I recognise the memory stored in my body is from early childhood especially that of school physycial education lessons. My family never encouraged exercise so I did none at all apart from once a week at school. I loved weight lifting, shot put, long jump but if it was running or cross country I dreaded it. I was always at the back panting away out of breath feeling thoroughly sick. I realise tonight in many ways my body adamantly refuses to enjoy heart racing exercise due to these memories. Of which I am going to work with, do some Hooponopono on and I will also do some emotional freedom technique with my body too. My sacred vessel for my spirit.

Im also wondering if their is still a slight fear about having my heart race due to my fathers health issues before he passed on it does not feel that strong a feeling but perhaps a little may be in there too.

Interesting how a hate of heart racing exercise as a child follows through to adult life, of course it would, how could it not, but I am so very grateful to become aware of this now.

For those of you who do not know what Ho'oponopono is here is an excellent link on this fabulous healing process and if you click HERE you can download the soul song with Ho'oponopono which can help the process.

It is so very powerful! try it and enjoy the peace it brings!

In The Friggin Body!

Or should I say beautiful, absolutely divinely sublime body?! yes tonight was a great night of dance.

Our warm up at five rhythms was fast, hot, edgy, dynamic, sweaty and jumpin! I don't remember a time when it has felt that fast paced but boy did it liven up the room very very quickly.

Great beats, slow smoothies, crashing waves of chaos and giggly lyricals. My flowing was divine. I also recognised that my right side of my body moves easily and I tend to move to one side some of the time (my masculine) and my left side is just carried, so that is something to become more aware of.

Dancing with others was great with some partners and interesting with others and uncomfortable with just one person tonight. I did feel sexual energy tonight but not directed at anyone I just felt on fire literally! I must have been oozing sex appeal lol!! well it felt that way hehe!!

Chaos was so so happy for me I was overflowing with joy I could not stop smiling and laughing and giggling. I had no urge to growl or scream I just felt like smiling a lot.

Ocassionally I touched with others by accident, I found it interesting how an aspect of me is scared by touch in this way. Im glad I am aware of this. For example Adam was dancing towards me with his back and I jumped back as I was frightened he was going to bump into me and he must have noticed and smiled and prodded my belly with that cheeky smile of his. I realised sometimes I lose my flow and others bump into me and me into them, its like touch would hurt. And I guess its symbiotic of the learning I am gathering about myself in my life off the dance floor. How opening my heart to others allowing myself to be touch in my rawness a teeny part of me feels letting another into that rawness means I would be hurt.

Interesting how the dance floor shows up our innermost feelings and goings on.

At the end of the night somebody mentioned how they felt so connected with others until stillness and how they felt lonely and sad and disconnected from self and others in that wave of stillness. I found it interesting that some there are obviously very comfortable with physical touch with other people, very cuddly and flowing and enjoy flowing with another through touch yet in stillness may find being with oneself utterly difficult. I find I have the opposite experience. In stillness I connect with my soul, my heart and my body and I enjoy my inner world, my inner space. People talked about maybe during stillness if somebody wanted to reach out and needed connection to open that way for them in. For me whenever I have gone into stillness and partnered with others I lose my place in myself because I am just beginning to learn to enjoy my own presence and stillness and gently expanding this outward to connections with others.

Its just interesting to observe in myself what is going on for me.

Allowing others into my own little world is something I want more, yet I also need to focus on being okay in my world first and take my time with all of this.

Gratitude Block

Okay, I did the brandon bays journey process a couple of weeks ago on the subject of abundance. I faced a lot of sexual fears and opened up a lot to creating and allowing myself to create. I enjoyed a week of really heightened vibration, I chose what I was going to feel like, I created and enjoyed manifesting wonderful days at work and day dreaming about my wants in life. I received messages from spirit in the form of the programme Charmed. The programme froze a couple of times on the evening of my abundance journey at the time when one of the sisters said "its okay to want what you want" and "dream big".

Great confirmation.

This past few days I had a rapid reversal. Call it the inner saboteur, the frightened self, whatever, I stopped dreaming, had a panic of feelings, fear of dreaming what I want, imagining it, a block of some sorts. I then had an extreme anger outburst this morning where I just threw things around, screamed at poor Mike and just felt amazing rage at myself at my choices etc etc...

I had a reaction to my wage slip this month and went into old mode of basing my reality on what is happening now instead of dreaming and allowing myself to bring new into my life. I realised a dream I had a last week, where an Inca man (guide) took me, my father (masculine) and mother (feminine), up the top of mountain. In the dream I had this immense gratitude towards my father for bringing me there. I felt my heart open and just could not stop saying thankyou.

In reality (physical), I realise, gratitude for what I have in my life will allow me to bring the new in, yet I realise being grateful, is not something I do easily. This is another layer of the onion skin. Its like someone shoved a block inside the part of my heart that knows gratitude.

And while I can intellectually say I am grateful for my choices and experiences and what I have in my life, emotionally its just dead in there.

Of course this is another shift and awareness that is very very necessary for the next movement in my life journey.

I wonder how many 'spiritual' people are willing to accept and admit that they are not grateful and feel a similar block 'in there'. We all profess how grateful we are for life, for spirit for support but who truly is?

Those who are manifesting and creating and allowing the new in are those who are emotionally wholly grateful for life.

I want to be grateful too.

First Yoga Class

Tonight I did my first yoga class. It was very challenging and I realised how much my body needs stretching. I feel so much now that my body is my vessel for change and if my body is blocked, stuck, stagnant, not moving, not exercising, not stretching I am not stretching, moving into my fullest potential as a divine human being.

We did some moves that involved taking the feet over the head when lying on the back it was about trusting they would go all the way back and not know what was going on "back there". I took this to represent how trusting I am of myself and as it is something I am learning more each day it felt an important move. The first time I did it I felt scared, scared I would hurt myself scared I would roll over and feel embarrassed. But the second time I visualised myself doing it and I did, I could not hold my ankles but managed to balance on the floor. Its a beginning.

So time to stretch more into life and may my body show me how.

BLAH!

Tonight was another five rhythms dance. It was another strange night. Firstly this afternoon I had had a snooze for an hour in bed as I felt physically so tired. As I snoozed I said to myself "I am going to five rhythms" to see what that felt like. It felt neutral. I then said "I am staying home tonight" that too felt neutral. So I did what I normally do, I visualised myself going to five rhythms walking up to the door and opening and walking up the stairs, only I could not open the door and when it did open it pushed be back out of the building again. So I sat in bed wondering what the heck does that mean? not to go, to go? Anyway I decided to go and my friend Emma popped around and we travelled to 'The Space'together.

We walked up to the door and we could not open the door. Finally Adams wife Lorca said it was open and so I pushed it hard and it finally did open.

I greeted Adam, and felt rather quiet.

The dance began. Firstly my knees were so sore, it was like I had been exercising them all day, yet I had been in bed and not really moved them until that moment. My body felt very achy tonight.

The music was different, in a different spirit within me I probably would have relished in the Celtic tunes, as most of the people there did, but I just felt a dead feeling, and this too is okay. I am not judging my feelings here just expressing what came up.

I went through the waves danced with mainly men again, this again, is interesting , me, feeling safer in sacred man? this was unheard of a week ago. Woman, was the safe dance and man was a bit too scary for me. I did not feel a great deal of sexual energy flow tonight, some of the night I did, mainly when moving through the sexual energy of the masculine again. I had some discomfort in my ovaries, as at the moment I am ovulating. I have some tenderness there and while I may have been giving off pheremones I did not feel a great deal.

Staccato, well the sharp jagged movements while my body did them, just felt bored to me, I felt bored with my dance tonight.

Chaos I let go in short spurts, with hurtling screams and whoops coming out of me, yet still I felt quite dead inside.

During lyrical I watched the joy in the room, there was a great bunch of happy people there tonight, all catching the wave of joy, skipping around, spinning each other around I felt bored with my lyrical tonight. I thought what is the point in forcing lyrical? I could dance around all lyrical, all joyous, all silly, all light and sparkly but it was not authentically how I felt so I just did whatever came to me.

Stillness, part of me was still, part of me was saying "hmmmm....".
So as we gathered around in circle at the end of the night some people shared how the evening went for them and most nodded and agreed what a wonderful night it was so full of joy. I sat there quietly, thinking, hmmmmm... nope! not for me.

I left rather quietly, and I honour the experience I had.

Of course it would have been lovely to be all uppity and joyful but it was not what was happening in my body. While I had a few whoops as my body let go in chaos, most of the time it was just BLAH.

Vapourous Flowing Energy - I WAS

Tonight was my first five rhythms class in over a month and it was a very interesting evening. After doing the journey work yesterday on abundance and primarily all of the fears around sexuality that came up and were faced I entered this dance as a new person.

It was not a self consciousness around the people there, I felt this nervousness but it was different to anything I had felt before. My legs felt weak, my body felt weak, but not in a sick way, if I was to explain how i felt for over an hour of the dance I would say like a vapour, yet not in an ungrounded way.

I felt my hands feel the energy bodies of everyone around me, I felt all of these energy particles in my hands and my whole body also felt this. The nearest I can explain to how I would be if it was visualised would be raindrops on a spider web, yet even finer.

I tried to get rooted in my legs yet they did not feel like my legs, physicality of the room felt alien to me, but not in a spacey way. Its really difficult to explain how this felt. It was like if I could I would just float across the room as energy. Everything was super sensitive, like my energy body was taking a plaster cast of the surroundings, in the past the cast would have take just the big objects and the big details but now, since yesterday its like my energy body is taking in the finer aspects of the energies in my environment. I felt all my molecules in my body jiggling about, it was like my physical body was at a much faster speed than the physicality around me. Everything in my energy field felt speeded up.

This was so unreal for me, it felt like my first altered state for such a long period of time. I have had altered states in dance before and when in meditation or journeys but never for a long period while moving in my body.

Heightened awareness is the only way I can feel of describing the night.

As the night went on I managed to slow down my energy field a little so I felt more heavy or rather more in the physical room but still felt hyper sensitive. After some high energy dancing some clearing happend and my right ear blocked up and filled with fluid. This just made the dance even more surreal, listening with one ear all night. I enjoyed the dance with others, flirting a lot with the balanced masculine in the room. The sacred in man. I just realise most of the night I danced with 'man' this was a change for me as I would normally dance in the safety of 'woman' yet tonight something in me had felt a strength of character a strength of presence, masculine energy in balance fielded with feminine.

OH!

Sexuality & Prosperity Consciousness

I did another Brandon Bays journey today with a local trainee practitioner in my area, it took over 3 hours but really really made me realise how much abundance, prosperity consciousness relates to how we experience sex, sexuality and our own feelings and beliefs about this topic.

I totally had not expected the issue of sex to come up again and the fears I had around this area. I was booked in for an abundance journey and during a brandon bays process you are walked through feelings you have, where they are in the body, what those fears have to say to you and what is beneath those fears. You keep going beneath each fear, expanding it until it is huge and fills all of you, your cells your energy body etc etc... and then you go beneath that fear and on until you get to the root.You then go backwards from the I AM presence state, the state of pure divinity and give yourself insights and loving messages to each fear and track through the process again.

Memories can come up and interesting feelings. Often totally unexpected memories from childhood, for example one of mine went as far back as being a baby in my cot and a fear at that time.

Anyway, I had a fear, and then went beneath the fear, I saw and felt a colour and it related to sexual fears and boy that fear was huge.It makes complete sense to understand if we have blockages and resistance to prosperity and abundance it would relate to our own feelings around sexuality. Sexual energy is LIFE FORCE energy, if we are unable to let a balanced experienced of this into our lives it would stand to reason we would have issues around allowing our divine right of abundance in too.I felt this was an important thing to mention, for anyone with fears, blocks, patterns related to abundance (abundance being - monetary, friendships, joy, health etc etc).

So as I said in another blog sexual energy is life force, is creative energy, if it is not flowing healthily inside of ourselves abundance, receiving, allowing is not either.

Perhaps the term sexual magnetism can also relate to being a money magnet too!

Interesting. Beautiful experience. I healed a generations worth of fears around this topic.

The Voice Within

Have you ever watched your chitter chatter going on inside your own mind? I bet most of us haven't for longer that a few seconds at a time. We tend to listen to this voice all of the time and rarely watch this voice. I know many spiritual teachers speak of being the watcher of the thinker, observer of the feelings, what would it look like if your inner chatterbox was externalised outside of you? if you gave it clothes, a face, hair. What if you spent a few minutes with it? an hour? a day? I just tried that out and funnily enough my inner chatterbox looked like one of the seven dwarfs, dopey!

Talk about manic! if you really watched this person, dont try and stop the thoughts just have some time with this new friend, or if you can manage it spend the day with this person. What kind of friend would they be?

I watched dopey and listened, dopey went something like this:

"See you cant even remember the name you just gave me"

"I dont care I will remember"

"Im gonna jump over there"

"No over there"

"look up there"

"look down there"

"im gonna spin around"

"flobbidy dobble"

"look what you just did"

"i did nothing"

"yes you did"

"no I didnt"

"im playing a game"

"yes its crazy"

"this game"

"yep its a game"

"wonder what we can have for tea"

"my nose is blocked"

"Oh god this is a stupid pointless exercise".........

And this is one person!

Yes you have guessed it our inner chatter is what has been governing our lives. If you had a friend that gave you advice like Dopey would you take them seriously?

DOPEY:

"What does this look like?"

"Looks okay"

"Does my bum look big?"

"oh God my bum does look big"

"no it doesnt its looking quite pert"

"dont talk such crap it looks flabby"

So would you take this person seriously? they cannot make there mind up.

How does your inner voice go?

I have been reading this book called 'The Untethered Soul' by Michael Singer and he writes about how we have this inner voice narrating our lives. I realised in the car coming back from Glastonbury today I am becoming bored with this voice. Their was a beautiful sunset and instead of simply enjoying the momentary (in the present moment) experience of feeling the sunset and seeing the sunset a voice spoke "isnt it beautiful!".

AND it did make me wonder do I want my life narrated after the event? what about simply being in that moment without labelling the moment?

Its control, of course the mind likes to control. According to this book the first step is becoming aware of the chatterbox, the next step is watching the chatterbox and practising this daily.

Do you want a narrator of your life? or to simply experience LIFE!?

2008

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

It is 2008 and numerologically speaking it is a number 1 year.

We have just left 2007 a 9 year.



9 = Completion



1 = New Beginnings



For a wonderful empowering message on this click HERE





On Kryons channelled message he speaks of the past 4 months up until the 2nd week of January as being a challenging time and from the 2nd week in January a shift will take place.